Sunday, October 28, 2007

The problem with cool whip

It seeks to top someone else’s creation in an overly extravagant, supposed value-added way, yet without it, dessert is still dessert; but, without dessert, cool whip has little relevance. Fluff is never enough. It’s a Johnny-come-lately trying to be stately. It doesn’t have the deep history of dessert. It is sweet but sweetness is a poor substitute for inherent weakness.

cool whip is the longest little white lie with the strongest implications. It represents the artificial portion of humanity not the cream of the crop like cool people. cool whip needs its act whipped for real. Yet, no amount of whipping will make it butter, which is why it does not enhance taste. The problem with cool whip is that it really isn’t.

“cool whip” is a metaphor. “Cool Whip,” on the other hand, is a brand of Kraft Foods.