Most of us will encounter that moment when we become aware of something our friend doesn't know but should know. Sometimes this information is not pleasant. Suddenly, telling the truth becomes complicated. We hem and haw past unconditional love and usually end up making the error of omission by deciding not to tell our friend the truth. Instead we decide it's a good idea to tell someone else whose business it isn't which always only makes things worse.
Once we decide not to tell the truth we offer poor excuses as good reasons. We believe the other person doesn't want to hear the information or will be upset with us. We superimpose our thoughts and emotions onto the friend. The problem with this broken logic is none of it changes the truth or forms the basis for friendship.
In these instances, emotion influences reason and reason ignores wisdom. The only thing worse than mind-centered living is emotion-centered living. When we choose not to tell, we do friends, ourselves and the truth a disservice. We participate in deception because we must pretend not to know what we know.
The decision to tell a friend the truth is no different than telling a friend how we feel about anything or what we want or what we don't want. Each of these decisions involve the truth, feelings and possible reactions.
Friendship without honest open communication doesn't exist. Sooner or later the truth emerges and the friend always asks or wonders who knew, for how long, why didn't somebody say something or at least send an anonymous letter? At this point, we finally realize, uncertain unpleasantness involved with telling the truth is much easier to deal with than the certain unpleasantness and betrayal associated with not telling the truth.
The real decision comes down to doing the right thing or doing the fright thing. Telling and truth are certainties, feeling and reaction are not. Unless a friend has told us they prefer not to know the truth, then we must tell it without delay, avoid the error of omission and thus avoid making things worse.
When something needs to be said it comes down to the friend's right to know and being a friend. It's in the contract. How a friend feels about the truth is never in our control and not our responsibility; however, it is in our control and responsibility to say what needs to be said. Finding courage never loses friendship. Telling a friend the truth and avoiding the error of omission form the foundation of unconditional love.
Related:
"Cool People,” a poem from Eloquence: Rhythm & Renaissance.
Socialism Is Really Being Social
Shame On You
Holy Words Of Love
