If you do not understand racism (white supremacy) and how it works, everything else you understand will only confuse you. - Neely Fuller

We need something to clarify everything for us, because we get confused...but if we use the concept of Asili, we will understand that whatever it is they are doing, whatever terms they use, however they come at you, you need to be thinking about what? How is this going to facilitate their power and help them to dominate me? -Marimba Ani

Saturday, May 30, 2015

How Contradictions Drove Me Crazy
Unity Consciousness #279

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One day I woke up and realized I was a different gender than some humans. I then gathered and compiled a packet of thinking about my gender. I read and reread everything until memorized. I internalized this thinking until I automatically knew what to think and do in terms of gender.

I continued to realize things about myself. As I did, each time I gathered and compiled a packet of thinking to explain things to me. I had a packet on skin color, country of birth, national origin, religion, ethnicity, culture, the part of the country I was in, the type of work I did, and on and on and on.

I realized there was enough information to create a packet of thinking for everything about people. This was also possible for everything people did. Each packet contained information on what made that category different from others, but never did any packet explain the ways in which each category was the same. There were many variations of packets about the same category.

Due to the process of logic, before I even finished reading the second packet of thinking, I realized, in many ways, the thinking in the second packet didn't match or complement the thinking in the first packet. The same thing was true for all other packets.

In order to continue thinking in all sorts of contradictory ways, when faced with contradictions, I decided each time which side of the contradiction I would follow. Though this was acceptable to me, it was not sensible to me. Even so, I kept on living this way, allowing contradictory thinking to drive my behavior.