Most of us would not trade our current lives for the life of other people, just to get what they have.
Furthermore, we can't get the things we seek without getting the other things that also come along with the things we seek.
It's always a package deal.
Therefore, in whatever way we seek validation, a package of tradeoffs also apply. We must give things in order to get other things.
So if we are seeking validation, for instance, from a family member, then we must give up other things about self, in order to get that validation and in order for that validation to provide the sense of satisfaction we seek. We all know people who have something we wish we had, yet when we look at the overall life, the person has problems, just like us, just different kinds of problems in different areas.
Is it wise to trade one set of problems for another set of problems?
When we pursue or value the things others have or things other do, in order to get that sense of self satisfaction, that's exactly what we are doing. We are following wrong paths to get wrong things that we think are going to provide us a unique personal sense of satisfaction, even though we are essentially trying to copycat someone else's thinking and behavior using the wrong basis for doing so. If we have the correct basis (context, thus knowledge of self), then yes, we should copycat the behavior that keeps us grounded in the correct context. If we don't, then over and over and over again it has been proven that validation sought through other humans, even if achieved, is insufficient to create satisfaction, wholeness, health. Validation is the search for satisfaction, which speaks to:
beingness, UC#1079
free will, UC#1426
the manes, UC#1511
greater good, UC#1089
what we crave, UC#930
Validation is Valuation: Self-Valuation, Self-Evaluation
The search for validation is ultimately the search for feeling good about self. This feeling comes from what we think about ourselves. Part or most of what we think about ourselves comes from other humans. Not just people you talk to or who have an opinion about you, but also from other humans who have created the information you go by. All of this shapes what you think. We can push the reset button on all of this by understanding the One who created us. The more we understand about the Highest Authority, the more we can properly assess other information. We must seek understanding of the Creator through as many forms of creations as possible. This will help offset a lot of misinformation humans have about humans. Thus, then will correct misinformation about all else. If we haven't said it clearly enough up to this point in the journey, we say it now.Self goes along with all else. The two are inseparable. To the degree we understand all else is the degree to which we understand self. The context we use for all else is the context we use for self.Thus, validation, valuation, self-valuation, self-evaluation and self-validation are all dependent upon our understandings regarding the whole.
Doesn't it make sense that wholeness of understanding is necessary in order to be whole and feel whole, thus be properly evaluated by ourselves and by others? As we recognize the truth of who we are, where we came from, why we are here and what is what, then our entire context, thus definition and need for validation, changes.
The need doesn't go away, it just changes as to what validation means and the sources and forms of validation.
Just remember that validation has many synonyms that we use daily, both consciously and subconsciously. An enormous amount of information is embedded in our logic that we quickly refer to all day long. In terms of synonyms for validation we use one example:
For instance, one form of validation is our need for “being right.”
We feel validation when we feel “right.”
It is difficult to fully understand what is “right” without understanding more about what is “wrong,” and of course, understanding as many of the synonyms of right and wrong as possible. In other words, every piece of logic we have must have a wholeness attached to it in order for that logic to be whole and contribute to wholeness thinking. As we go through this process of doublechecking our logic, a lot of human misunderstandings become exposed because, when we apply words like “validation,” “right” and “wrong” to broader range of humans and superhumans, we recognize the logic doesn't fit. At that point we can stick with stuck logic or we can begin to make adjustments to our understandings in order to reconcile our logic, so that all logic applies to all creations. And it does, it's just that right now, the suboptimal portion is manifesting more noticeably among humans. And this is why the seeking of validation is currently in suboptimal mode among humans; however, the optimal is asserting itself here and there, bit by bit, to help us recalibrate our logic regarding our search for satisfaction through various forms of validation.
i.e. I am worth something because I am in a relationship. I am worth something because I have a job or an office job. I am worth something because I am male, because I am white, because I have money, because look at my clothes, my car, my house, because because because because because, and so on and on we go using suboptimal identifiers of self. And isn't validation about identification, our identity? As a result, a lot of us have turned our search for validation into a form of meritorious manumission, because we are seeking permission from others in order to feel okay about what we think and do. When instead, the litmus test is how what we think and do fits into the whole. The whole is larger than our human societies and larger than all human societies. If what you think and do allows all creations to be who they were created to be, then you are closer to the whole total truth that validates.
Thus, instead of validation being suboptimal as a form of meritorious manumission by humans, validation becomes optimal as a form of gratefulness to live a life worthy of the price of admission freely granted by the All-In-One.
*Satisfaction is a combined form of the mother (Satis) and father (Fa). Satisfaction comes from the proper functioning of the two truths. Sa, Fa, Ma, Pa, Ba, Ka, Ha are all forms of the same thing. (UC#1544) (pa-rent, parent).
Satisfaction is Satis-fa-function and Satis-fa-action.
